Mechanical thinking

You know how it go. Everything need a likkle servicing sometime, so mi stop by mi mechanic this morning.

As early as the morning is, one bag a long seed man a stand up under a mango tree a chat. Nuttn else nuh dey dey fi do? U a try drive in an every body haffi a shift outa di way AN' a give u instruction on how fi drive.

"Ben' it up son, Dawdy"
"Go suh now"
"Awrite come back likkle ... Awrite u dat"

U eva see nuttn go suh? Look how long mi a drive?! Some a dem likkle young bwoy ... tink dem know everyt'ing. A dem u see a drive out ppl car [Kiss teet]

Now, one a di mechanic likkle prento come siddung in my car fi check one a di connection dem fi di indicator that wasn't working. Dis likkle bwoy ya smell like water fraid fi touch him. Now, I know working man. U nuh haffi smell like somn wey dead and lef out ina di sun!

So mi tell him "Look here, just come outa mi car"
"Dawdy u nuh see me a look pon somn"
"Mi look like u fahda bwoy? Come outa mi cyar. Find some wata and go bade u skin!"

Him likkle pissn tail bredren dem nuh stop laff. Mi haffi tell dem fi shet dem r**s! Caw, DEM shoulda tell him.

Mi dun do wey mi a do and a try lef' di place. Same ting again. Every body haffi shift outa di way.

Di likkle yout' open di gate and rub off mi big finga.
"Respec' u nuh Elda, respect"

Aye sah!

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